My AKB48 Top Five!

As evidenced by my recent post fangirling over their latest kick-ass B side, AKB48 is probably my number one J-Pop group at the moment. I don't know the name of every girl in every stage yet (here's a hint: there are at least 48), and I don't know how I feel about the show choir aspects of watching stages (if I did it would be Stage K, fyi), but the singles have been, as of late, way better than the tired shit Hello! Project is regurgitating. Also, wow, these girls are exceptionally fun and cute! So without further ado or parenthesis: かわいい!!!

5. Erena Ono

Why? Her presence. Could be her smooshy little lolibait face, could be the fact she makes you feel like a complete pedophile for admiring her dancing, but when I watch an AKB48 video I always am drawn to whatever Erena's not doing.

4. Minami Minegishi

Why? She's the stellar superstar dancer of AKB48! And despite looking about all of 15 years old, in a recent interview with the other members they named her "charm points" as being rebellious and thighs. Ahem.

3. Sae Miyazawa

Why? This is a picture of Sae after her parents were killed and her house was burned to the ground. Maybe. I don't know what must happen in her life, but she is so goddamn happy that I want to bottle her essence and use it in place of my Lithium.

2. Sayaka Akimoto

Why? Because I think that her and I could spend the rest of our lives together in a little house near a lake with two cats in the yard and Erena Ono as our adoptive daughter and we would be so happy with this arrangement that gay marriage would be legalized just by the evidence of our happiness. Also, she's the best singer in AKB48 (imho, haters).

1. Tomomi Kasai

Why? I've read that her "droopy eyes" always make her look "emo". I've read that her voice is so high and annoying it can set off car alarms. I've read that she may or may not be able to read and her ability to divide two digit numbers might be lacking. However, she is my number one. I love that she loves her cat "Naa-chan". I love that she seems sort of demented and insane in a lovable, darling way. I think she's a fine dancer, singer and presence. Mostly I think her "droopy eyes" make me fixate on the kind of physical discrepancies (for lack of a better phrase)that I find absolutely delicious. That's right. She beat out Sayaka for having droopy eyes. And goodnight.